Archive for February, 2008

Please Explain This To Me…

Posted in Random with tags , on February 22, 2008 by telepromptedanthems


Brad Smeele landed a 1080 this week in New Zealand. That’s right: a ten-eighty. Three full spins. The move that the entire industry has been taking a colossal shit over for the better part of a decade. Only a handful of people have ever done it and if you’ve been reading the magazines, you’d think it was the GD holy grail of wakeboarding. Look, there’s even a sequence of it.

So someone please explain to me why we haven’t heard about it yet.

To be honest, I could really care less about 1080’s; they don’t really look that cool and people insist on talking about them ALL THE TIME. But I do have to say that it’s ridiculous that we get an up-to-date tally whenever Danny Harf or Rusty Malinoski land each one, but when Brad Smeele does one, we don’t even get a news blurb about it. I did find some talking about it on some of those online forums, but that’s far from official and honestly, half the stuff on those forums is bullshit anyway. I couldn’t find a single mention of it on Alliance’s site or WBM’s site. I did, however see that Danny Harf landed his second one on Thursday, January 31st.

Now, you have to understand, I have nothing against Danny Harf or Rusty Malinoski. I think Danny’s a total bad ass and Rusty can do some pretty crazy looking stuff, but I seriously can’t believe Smeele’s not getting any love for this. It seems like it would make an even better story because the dude is relatively unknown. When the other 1080’s went down, I remember reading news posts on Alliance saying stuff like “…just got off the phone with so-and-so, a 1080 was landed about seven minutes ago!!!! Hurrah!!!” Now, several days after Smeele’s, no one has even officially acknowledged it. Think about that: a wakeboarder from down under landing a 1080 and nobody officially acknowledging it.

Wait a minute…this sounds familiar…

My advice to Brad: move to Florida, bro down a little bit, start bench pressing small cars and get a bunch of lame-ass tattoos; you’ll be a star in no time. Call me when you need an agent.


This Guy is the Shit

Posted in Random with tags on February 18, 2008 by telepromptedanthems


Just saw this anonymously posted in the comments section. Happy Monday, people.

know this doesnt belong on this post but i cant make my own blog posts and i thought everyone should know about this.

This is probably the most embarassing thing that has ever happened to me. I was at my girlfriends house tonight for dinner, and shortly after i had to go #2. My Gf’s brother was in the downstairs bathroom, so i went upstairs to use the master bathroom. I was about to take a dump, and I remembered something my friend told me called AC Slatering. AC Slatering is when you take a dump facing backwards on the toilet, just how on saved by the bell AC Slater always sat backwards on a chair. So when I was taking a dump, My stomache was facing the back of the toilet, and my back was facing the door. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs, and began to get nervous. Since AC SLatering is a tough position to get into, it requires taking off your pants. So there I am sitting in my GF’s parents bathroom taking a dump with my pants off and facing the wrong way on the toilet. My dump was about halfway out when the footsteps became closer. I then turned around to see that I had not locked the door.

Trying to finish as quickly as I could, I began pushing harder and harder. Suddenly, the door opened, and my gf’s mom stood there in shock staring at me. We made eye contact for a split second, and I was so embarassed I wanted to die. I quickly finished up, got dressed, and ran out of the house as quickly as I could. I am expecting my gf to break up with me tommorow.

Pretty much the most awesome thing I’ve read in a great while.

Quick Question…

Posted in Random with tags , , on February 11, 2008 by telepromptedanthems


Why is it that whenever you’re in a crowded bar and Bon Jovi’s “Living On A Prayer” comes on, everyone in the building goes nuts, puts their hands in the air, and sings along at the top of their lungs like it’s the last time the damn song will ever be played? Just curious…

Featured Rider – Jason Green

Posted in Features, Wakeboarding on February 8, 2008 by telepromptedanthems

Look, people…it’s winter. It’s cold outside, there’s a crazy drought going on, and not much is happening in the wakeboarding world. Sorry there’s not a ton of stuff to look at right now, but don’t you worry; that will be changing in a few months.

To tide everyone over, here’s a short little clip from a guy named Jason Green. Jason’s been riding for a while now, but this past summer, he stepped it up big time and ended up winning the advanced division at Riverfest back in October. As he was accepting his trophy, I heard a few people in the crowd asking who this guy was and where he came from. Well people, the answer is Wilmington, NC and if last summer is any indication, you ought to keep an eye on him in ’08.

Jason called me up the other day and asked if I could put him together a sponsor-me video. Since I’m such a nice guy, I said yes, but when I started digging through the clips I had of him, I realized there wasn’t a whole lot to pick from. So consider this a disclaimer of sorts: what you are about to see isn’t the best representation of Jason’s riding and it’s kind of short, but like I said before; there’s much more to come.

See you guys this weekend at the Charlotte boat show…

Go Giants!

Posted in Random with tags , , , on February 8, 2008 by telepromptedanthems

I know it’s late, but whatever.

I really didn’t care who won the Super Bowl this year, as long as it wasn’t the freaking Patriots. I honestly would have pulled for a team comprised of key members of the Taliban before I pulled for New England. I guess they’re good and all, but I’m sick of hearing about them and their coach is a dickweed. Dude can’t even stick around until the game’s over? What a douchebag.

So, in honor of the Patriot’s loss, I present to you…the future of football…Cody Paul!